You see these comments? I’m tired of them.
You want me to tell you how it is? I want to play with the Creatures. But nowadays, everything they do is done in-person. Skype isn’t even an option. I’ve begged time and time again for them to try to include me in things I could do from Skype. I always get the same response. “It’s too difficult.” I’d love to be in Treetopia via Skype, it seems like it would be very easy to do, but I don’t know their setup. Just accept their response for what it is.
When it comes to recording for our own channels, a lot of the Creatures I recorded with don’t really focus a whole lot on their channels or aren’t even a part of the group anymore. Jordan is hard at work running the office and working on Tr4pville. Dan edits the hub’s videos. Gassy is no longer a Creature. Chilled is no longer a Creature. Sp00n and I record sometimes, but that’s not on the hub. I know you guys like to think of The Creatures as this big happy family, but I haven’t exactly been a part of that as much. I have much better relationships with some of the members over others and have little to no interaction with some of them. There’s no beef with any of them, I’ve just never been a regular for any of the rest of the guys, so not a whole lot happens between us… I don’t contact them and they don’t contact me, idk. I openly admit, I fit in a lot better in the 2011 (and earlier) version of the Creatures compared to today.
I don’t even plan to be on the PAX East panel because I haven’t done much. I haven’t been informed about it much and I don’t appear to be on the panelist list anyways. But why would I want to be a panel where everyone is likely looking at me thinking “So what do you do around here?” I’d rather spend my birthday doing something else and save that embarrassment for another time. I only want to do things with the group when I feel like I belong there and I’m not just shaking my head in approval for the things the other guys have been working on.
The dynamics of how the group functions has changed over time. Unless I move to Colorado (Which I am not prepared to do), I have to stick to recording with people who work with the same dynamics as me, over Skype. Stop assuming I’m sitting here silently protesting the Creatures and not doing anything on their channel. Like the other guys have said, it’s just too difficult. At times, I’m afraid if I suddenly put something on the hub, the comments would say things like “WELL LOOK WHO DECIDED TO SHOW UP ASSHOLE” I don’t want my sole motivation to do things to be “not to get kicked out” That’s pretty shitty and demotivating.